مدير عام كرة القدم
West Ham legend Michail Antonio joins Adebayo Akinfenwa for episode two of the brand new Beast Mode On Podcast with the 35-year-old providing an emotional account of his arduous road to recovery after the car crash in December 2024 that left him lucky to be alive.
Antonio, who left West Ham at the end of the 2024-25 season having spent 10 years with the Hammers and become their record الدوري الإنجليزي الممتاز goalscorer in the process, opens up on the impact the crash had on his life and how a Beyonce song that was released in 2011 resonated deeply with the Jamaica international, ultimately helping him get through that traumatic period.
Scroll down to read Antonio’s account of the aftermath of the crash, with the full episode of the Best Mode On Podcast available now, via YouTube and Spotify.
West Ham legend Michail Antonio joins Adebayo Akinfenwa for episode two of the brand new Beast Mode On Podcast, with the 35-year-old providing an emotional account of his arduous road to recovery after the car crash in December 2024 that left him lucky to be alive.
Antonio, who left West Ham at the end of the 2024-25 season having spent 10 years with the Hammers and become their record Premier League goalscorer in the process, opens up on the impact the crash had on his life and how a Beyonce song that was released in 2011 resonated deeply with the Jamaica international, ultimately helping him get through that traumatic period.
Scroll down to read Antonio’s account of the aftermath of the crash, with the full episode of the Best Mode On Podcast available now, via YouTube and Spotify.
Reflecting on that traumatic day, Antonio tells Akinfenwa: “What’s crazy about it, everybody in the world experienced that crash more than me. Even though I was in it, I didn’t live it because I don’t remember anything about it. I don’t remember the crash, I don’t remember being in the hospital, I don’t remember going in for the operation, I don’t remember coming out of the operation. There were loads of emotions coming through, my body remembers stuff even though my mind doesn’t. What I’ve learnt from the car crash is football’s important, but your health is more important.
“There was a lot of stuff I kept pushing back, that I kept not doing because I was being lazy. I kept saying to everybody; ‘I want to get into TV, do my presenting, do my podcast’, and I never really pushed it. It’ll be done another time. But that time nearly didn’t happen because I almost died.”
One song in particular aided Antonio during his recovery, reducing him to tears as he consumed the lyrics. The 35-year-old added: “I was in Dubai with my kids, my daughter loves Beyonce, [and the song] I Was Here. Have you listened to those words? I’ve listened to it so many times but since the car crash, I listened to it and I was just sitting there, in a room with my kids but I’ve gone into a corner and I was crying.
“Those words, when you’ve been through what I’ve been through, when you’ve nearly died. When I was listening to it, I’ve gone. Now I’m at that stage where I’m going to bring myself happiness. I’m going to do whatever needs to be done. As much as the crash was a curse, it was also a blessing. It’s brought so many things to light and made me more focused and driven to do what needs to be done.”n
Antonio left West Ham when his contract expired in the summer of 2025, although he made an incredible return to the pitch at the end of the 2024-25 season as he turned out for Jamaica at the Gold Cup. Coming on as a substitute in his preferred forward areas of the pitch during that tournament, the former Sheffield Wednesday star recalls a time when then-Hammers boss Slaven Bilic insisted he played as a right-back – something that didn’t go down well with the veteran forward.
He tells Akinfenwa: “I spoke to the gaffer and he was like: ‘I want you to do me a favour, we’ve signed no right-backs, I think I can make you one of the best right-backs in the world’. First game of the [2016-17] season against Chelsea. He’s (Slaven Bilic) gone to me: ‘Trust me, I’m going to be here for you [while you play ay right-back]’. I’ve done a mad flick. I don’t know what I was thinking at the time, I tried to dink it over [Eden] Hazard in my own box, lost the ball. He’s done a one-two and I’ve tripped him up for a pen. The gaffer’s dragged me, instantly. And I was like: ‘This is why I can’t play right-back’. I’m attack-minded, I think of these stupid things to do in my own box. No need.
“From that moment, I’m not playing there anymore. I won’t play there. The gaffer pulled me up about it at the end of the game. I made a mistake. In the end I just went: ‘I’m not playing there no more, this is not my position, put me back on the wing or don’t play me’. ‘I don’t enjoy playing there, it’s ruining my football’. He was angry. He was like: ‘When I tell you to play somewhere you play there’. And I’ve done that, for nearly a year now, but that’s not my position. So put me back in my place. It was crazy, next week he played me right wing and I scored the very first goal at the London Stadium.”
